Am I a joke to this Ibadan Micra drivers? Just before I asked this question, I had to double-check with myself. This is the story of an innocent girl and a Micra driver, so brace yourself. It was not funny this day o because I was so embarrassed. I mean, after I’ve dressed up so decently and feeling myself, a Micra driver had the guts to insult me. I see it as an insult. E pain me, kai.
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So on this fateful day, I left my house to say hello to a friend. It was a planned visit so it was not like I was jobless. I left my room wearing a chiffon shirt and a pair of jeans with slippers and sunshades (because it was sunny). My dressing was casual so why did that have to happen.
Ideally, I try as much as possible not to enter all those Micra because they are often too tight, sometimes smelly and the drivers can insult for Africa. But I had to take it this day because I didn’t know where exactly I was going to and taking a bike was a bad idea. They will behead me with a hiked price (even though the cost of transportation in Ibadan could be very affordable). My friend also suggested that I take Micra instead. If I had known, I would have taken bike jejely.
That’s how I strolled to the junction after walking past all these young Ibadan boys that try to tease people. If only they knew I was already immune, awo boys in OAU already taught me lessons. You could tell that I was minding my business. After waiting for a while, I finally got a cab going my way. I stopped the cab, told him where I was going and I was surprised at how much he called the fare. It was way lesser than I had expected. I kept my surprise because I was not ready to be scammed.
So I entered at the front with a small boy because that was the only space left. It was not too uncomfortable because the boy was young and he was neat. I didn’t know what was coming. If only somebody told me.
It started like this…
After moving for a bit, the cabman started with, I like your shades o aunty (if you are familiar with Ibadan, please try to read this in their voice). I didn’t even say anything because it one of those things. He continued again, I like your shades o. I mean, you said it the first time and I heard you. The problem started when this man said it the third time. I wish it ended there o.
We kept on moving and this man asked me again, where are you going? In my head I was like, I freaking told you before I entered this cab. I was even scared he was not going my way. Until he said you want to go and see them abi. Lmao. Yea its a joke but news flash, only my friends get to crack that joke with me. I didn’t even flinch because I was not ready to start any conversation that will lead to abuse.
I can take care of you, lmao
Then he went ahead to say, you know that I can take care of you. Mogbe! Emi! Me of all people. I was weak, embarrassed, and disturbed. I looked at the man and could not help but laugh. But I still kept quiet, I didn’t say anything o. The journey continued and I just hoped the man will receive sense. My people this man did not. As we went on, people started getting down until it was just me and the boy. I was lowkey praying that I won’t have to be alone in the cab with that man. I had heard cases of people that were kidnapped by those Micra drivers. No lies, I was scared.
The boy got down
My fear came to life as this boy got down just a few junctions to mine. I knew that man was going to move mad so I was prepared. I was already sitting at the back at this point when the boy got down. That was how this man said I should come and sit beside him at the front that he wants to be looking at my face. What’s on my face that he wants to be looking at? As you already guessed, I didn’t answer. That’s how he continued o, I swear I wish I could write everything in Yoruba. Just try to read it in Yoruba or imagine a cab driver saying these things.
“Baby I like you and I want to be taking care of you. You are very fine o. Don’t think because I’m driving a cab I don’t have money o. I will spoil you”.
It was as if I should cry
I was so weak that I could cry. Emi ma ni! This man was now telling me all this rubbish. I just shook my head and faced the front. Next thing, he said, don’t mind all these small boys that are deceiving you o. I will satisfy you with money and with the real thing. See at this point I could not hold my peace. I had already tried. Mo ti try mhen.
Knowing I was close to my bus stop, that’s how I started o. The first question was, am I a joke to you? What do you take me for? For my mind, English would make me look like what? Baba did not understand o but I guess he understood that I was already pissed from the tone of my voice. So he started, what is wrong with you sef? I want to take care of you but you are showing yourself. Ashewo, you are Kuku going to work. Make sure they pay you well o.
At this point…
At this point if I had talked, I would have beaten the man or maybe he would have beaten me. So I let him get to my bus stop. As soon as we got there, my voice went to the highest. Ahh, I abused this man, in Yoruba of course. When I was satisfied, I now started asking myself questions. Why did this man think he could talk to me like that? Am I a joke to him? Or is my shirt revealing? I was not even wearing makeup. After several doublechecking with myself, I concluded that it was the man that had a problem not me. O ma dun mi o (I was so pained).
See ehn, Ibadan Micra drivers will make you lose your home training. I’m not even joking. There and then, I promised myself that it would never happen again. I was determined to never take Micra again just to avoid Ibadan Micra drivers. But then who am I deceiving? It’s just like saying you won’t take danfo in Lagos.
Have you had a similar experience with Ibadan Micra drivers? Share with me in the comment section, I can’t be the only one, please.
What would you have done if you were me? And please describe that man in one sentence.
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