I Failed Again! How to Rise Above Failure

I failed again! I’m not good enough! I can’t do this! Maybe this is not meant for me! Maybe I should not have done it in the first place!

Are these familiar thoughts that run through your mind whenever you fail or things don’t go as planned?

Here is the basic truth you must admit as you read through this piece; It is okay to fail! All success stories are laced with failures. However, what makes those stories inspiring to you is a happy ending. You most likely pay less attention to the very important part of such stories; the steps taken to overcome the failures encountered in the path to success. You are quick to blame yourself on why nothing is working and no progress is made. Your constant question has been what am I doing wrong?

Let me share a short story with you and then answer the lingering question in your mind. Leggo!

I had to go back to 100level when my friends were moving to 300level. Ikr!

You can only imagine how I felt going back to be in the same class with people I ought to be ahead of. I was a mess. I was a smart girl, at least when I was in secondary school. Lol.  I lost my self-esteem and I just wanted to run away. There’s a way life will try to embarrass you. Are you still wondering why I had to go back?

It’s simply because I failed… I failed chemistry in WAEC and at every attempt to try again, I still failed. Much more than failing chemistry in secondary school, I failed it again in the university (I didn’t know I would have to do it again). It is quite a long story and I can’t go into details.

But I will like to share the most important highlights, what I did differently! With my last drop of strength and ray of hope (I am not even sure I had any, actually), I decided to try again.

I know you’ll think that it’s not easy… Well, it is also not that hard, really. I know because I’ve been through it.

Know this for a start; failure is not the end of the world. It is true that what does not kill you makes you stronger if you learn from it. See it as an opportunity to begin again.

How to rise above failure

There might be many tips out there but I’ll share these ones with you because they are personal. They have worked for me and they might work for you too.

1. Pick up yourself

Over time, as I encounter down moments in my journey of life, I have come to terms with the fact that accepting a situation and facing the reality is the first step to overcoming failure. Get this right, accepting a situation does not translate to wallowing in self-pity. It is only a perquisite to picking up oneself. The earlier you accept failure the sooner you deal with self-denial of the reality. Again, accepting failure should be for the sole purpose of spurring you to overcome the failure.

2. Don’t be so hard on yourself

Did you notice I said don’t be so hard on yourself? It is completely normal to feel disappointed. You just want to give up because you feel you don’t deserve a second chance. Take it easy with yourself; do not hold on to regrets. Focus on improving yourself. Forgive yourself and move past it. Don’t dwell in the past, just because you had a setback does not mean you are doomed for life.

3. Learn from your mistakes

There’s always a lesson to be learned from every failure. Which other way should I have done this? Find out what the lessons are and keep it in mind while you try again. Remember that if you don’t learn from your mistakes, you’ll keep repeating the same mistakes.

4. Surround yourself with good people

It is important that you surround yourself with positive-minded people, especially while dealing with negative thoughts. These people will inspire you to pick yourself back up and go further than you thought you could go.

5. Don’t stop until you reach your goals

Set goals. Write them down and don’t stop working hard. You could also break those goals down into bits. Write them on a piece of paper and place them where you can see them every day. A step at a time and you’ll be surprised with your progress.

Most people don’t live their dreams because of the fear of failure but I encourage you not to give up. Remember that you can’t stop obstacles from appearing in your life. But, you can be positive in your perspective towards the obstacles and make them the stepping stone to success. The more you handle failures efficiently, the more successes you unlock. Believe in yourself and keep moving forward.

Do you have a similar experience or other coping mechanisms? Please share in the comment section.

With Love,

Opeyemi Omidiji.

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